What's up ya'll?! We're BACK with day 4 of our 30 lessons in 30 years. I really hope ya'll are liking these. Ok, let's get straight to it. The next lesson I've learned in my 30 years of life is:
ACCEPT THE PEOPLE SENT TO YOU; BUT, DON'T GET ATTACHED, SEASONS CHANGE.
Well, that one is lengthier than the others, but follow me. Have ya'll ever heard that saying about people in your life being like parts of a tree? Well, this lesson is pretty much that. I remember hearing Tyler Perry as Madea breaking it down for us like this (well not the full quote, but the gist):
Some people are meant to come into your life for a lifetime, some for only a season ...
I put everybody that comes into my life in the category of a tree.
Some people are like leaves on a tree. When the wind blows, they’re over there… wind blow that way they over here… they’re unstable. When the seasons change they wither and die, they’re gone. ...
Some people are like a branch on that tree. You have to be careful with those branches too, cause they’ll fool you. They’ll make you think they’re a good friend and they’re real strong but the minute you step out there on them, they’ll break and leave you high and dry.
But if you find 2 or 3 people in your life that’s like the roots at the bottom of that tree you are blessed. Those are the kind of people that aren’t going nowhere. ...
A tree could have a hundred million branches but it only takes a few roots down at the bottom to make sure that tree gets everything it needs. When you get some roots, hold on to them but the rest of it… just let it go. Let folks go.”
Oh, child that was a long quote! But it was necessary (It's not even the whole thing). I really don't think I have to say much more than the quote already does; but, I'll give you my take "real quick". Most of the lessons I've learned in life somehow are related to the topic of freedom. So let's take the lesson in parts:
Accept the people sent to you:
While we may not always know the reason someone is in our lives (unless The Holy Spirit helps us discern that they are not good for us) we should accept them for what they bring into the room. Don't hold your guard up and keep them at arm's length because of fear, but don't bust your life wide open and give them full access out of excitement either. Exercise wisdom, find the balance, and accept their presence in your life the way it naturally progresses. Maybe they were sent to you so you can help them, maybe so they can help you, maybe this is a season where they will help shift your perspective, or maybe this is a season you can help each other grow in a certain area. Whatever the reason, just be present in the season.
Now to this part
BUT; Don't get attached, seasons change:
While we accept people in our lives, don't get attached. Be careful not to make anyone a permanent fixture in your life. I know I know "But that's my best friend!" "But I've known them since we were 2!" "But that's my Husband/Wife!" "But ... but but but... I LOVE THEM!" Yes Yes, Good Good. But hear me out. What I'm talking about here is the unhealthy attachment that we give to people in our lives, and the unhealthy expectations we put on them. Sometimes when we commit to people, we don't realize that somewhere in the back of our minds, they have become an idol. Let me tell you something... people are going to disappoint you. Why? Not because they are bad people, but because they are human. Dr. Dharius Daniels wrote in his book Relational Intelligence " God sends certain people into our lives in certain seasons for certain reasons. However, while God sends them, we must see them. God releases them, and we must recognize them. God assigns them, and we must align them. (P. 14)" If you allow God to be the one to send people in and out of your life then the only one you need to get attached to is The Lord Himself. Everyone else "I love you if you stay. But I understand if you have to leave."
I really hope ya'll aren't thinking that I'm saying never to fully commit to anyone. I'm not speaking from a jaded and hurt heart ya'll. I'm speaking from a free heart. What I'm saying is GIVE PEOPLE THEIR FREEDOM. Allow them to occupy the space they were designed to occupy in your life EVEN IF THAT MEANS IT'S NOT FOREVER or always in the same capacity. If you try to hold on to them past their season, it will do more harm to the both of you than the hurt of letting them go ever would have.
The Bible says " To everything, there is a season and a time to every purpose under the heaven (Ecclesiastes 3:1)". So there is a season for everyone's purpose in your life, and you in theirs. If it is a lifetime purpose, then let it be so. If it is but for a moment, enjoy that moment, and then let them Go.
I love ya'll FOR REAL.
Check out the youtube video that goes with this post. Click Link.
Lighting up the woods, one Syllable at a time